Chapter Thirteen - Rocketing to Earth

In the lamest cliff-hanger cheat yet, Flash asks Aura if there's another way out of the turret and she says, "Yes! The trap-door!" They all bundle through it except Flash and Vulcan, who catch a bit of the blast. They take Vulcan back to the lab to nurse his wounds.

Ming orders everyone's deaths again. He says, "Prepare the Execution Chamber", although, sadly, we never get to see the Execution Chamber. It sounds cool, though.

Zarkov smugly wires up the door of the lab so that it's electrified. Various soldiers and Ming try the door several times and go "D'oh!" each time they get shocked. Everyone is standing around smiling as Zarkov announces "We can hold out indefinitely", but then Ming cuts the electricity to the room and, seconds later, Zarkov says "The electric energy has been cut off" and everyone looks sad.

Lion King's fleet of Spinning Top Ships attack and Ming brings the prisoners in to watch his ships destroy Lion King's men. However, Lion King's ships do better than Ming's and Flash taunts him.

Ming is about to have them all killed again (including his daughter, who he accuses of 'consorting with traitors' - he doesn't know the half of it) when Lion King and his men burst in and there's another big fight. Someone actually says, "It's THUN! And his Lion Men!"

In all the Smoke and Confusion, Ming escapes. He whispers something to the High Priest Of Evil, who is still faithfully manning the gong. He enters a chamber and is enveloped with smoke, then disappears. The High Priest tells Flash, Aura and Barin that Ming is dead. Flash seems more upset than Aura does. They return to the temple and the High Priest cackles, evilly.

The High Priest overhears Zarkov radioing the Stupid Earthlings that they're on their way home. He plants a bomb on their ship and does a rather cool thing where he walks straight into the camera, cackling away. It has to be said that the High Priest is camping it up even more than Vulcan.

Anyway, they all say their goodbyes - Aura is now one of the good guys and she's shacked up with Barin. As the ship flies off they hear the High Priest (still cackling) and get him to tell them about the bomb. They radio Flash and he chucks the bomb out of the window in the nick of time.

On their way to Earth they ask Professor Gordon to shut down every single electricity plant on Earth so they can re-enter the atmosphere safely. Professor Gordon goes, "Yeah, alright." Zarkov turns to tell Flash and Dale the good news but they're too busy making out. Zarkov watches them for longer than is strictly appropriate.

THE END

Chapter Twelve - Trapped In The Turret

Flash arrives as Dale is getting mauled (or possibly humped) by the Sacred Tigron. Dale actually looks like she can hold her own with the Tigron but Flash bursts in and kills it with his bare hands.

It's actually quite upsetting. Dale says, "Flash - you've killed him!" and Flash says, rather too nonchalantly, "Yes. I guess I got here just in time". I must say, they seem to be offing Sacred Creatures at a rate of knots - that's the Orangopoid, the Fire Dragon and now the Tigron in the space of four episodes.

Barin persuades Princess Aura that she'll never win Flash's heart by killing Dale. She agrees to help them escape. Barin's sweaty Belgian charms appear to be winning her over after all.

Aura asks Ming to let everyone go. Ming agrees, but you can tell he doesn't mean it.

Ming's guards destroy Zarkov's Invisibility Machine on Ming's orders. Zarkov is heart-broken, particularly as he never got to turn himself invisible with it. Dale and Flash arrive to tell Zarkov the good news, but Zarkov is still upset about his machine. Dale says, "But we weren't going to use it again anyway, were we?" and Zarkov shoots her a Look Of Death.

They contact the Stupid Earthlings and tell them they're coming home. Professor Gordon looks a little like Walt Disney. His reaction is a badly-delivered "That's welcome news."

Flash and friends don't trust Ming. Vulcan invites them to the Sky City before they leave for Earth. Ming sends his men to spy on everyone and seize any opportunity to destroy them all.

Barin arranges to send his rocket ship for them - he tells them he'll meet them at the Turret House, by the 'lake of rocks'. Sadly we don't get to see what a lake of rocks looks like. Ming's guards overhear the plan and Ming says he'll have an "excellent surprise" waiting for them, before slinking off in an evil fashion.

There's a lot of repeated footage of spaceships flying, the Giant Iguanas and even the (now supposedly imprisoned) High Priest striking the gong again. Flash and friends contact Lion King over the spaceograph again, but I'm not sure why. Perhaps they miss him. Or perhaps they are trying to set him up with Zarkov, since they share similar tastes in beards.

Anyway, they arrive at the Turret and see Barin's ship arriving, but it fires at them instead! As they duck into the Turret House the whole place explodes around them.

Chapter Five - The Destroying Ray

Ming saves The Shark City by activating some sort of ray that lifts the city into the air. The water drains out of it and Flash etc are saved. Hurrah. More Damp Dale action, plus there's a bit where Flash blatantly gropes her breasts as he's "rescuing" her.

Prince Barin shows up, looking like an extremely camp Belgian (chunky, moustache). He persuades Zarkov that he's the rightful ruler of Mongo. Zarkov seems to accept this without question. They go off to rescue Flash and Dale.


As they're leaving the city, Flash, Dale, Aura and Lion King are attacked...by Hawk Men! Dale gets captured again, along with Lion King.


Barin and Zarkov arrive in time to save Flash and Aura from the Hawk Men. They fly towards King Vulcan's City In The Sky (just how many animal-related kingdoms and kings does Mongo have, anyway?), but as they get closer, Vulcan orders his men to fire The Deadly Melting Ray! The ship takes a hit and starts to fall.
Meanwhile, Dale is about to get married again. King Vulcan looks like Brian Blessed gone very much to seed. He giggles a lot. Dale runs to the other side of the bedroom (nice escape plan, Dale) and Vulcan releases...his pet bear! ("Ursulo"). The bear has weird stripes, as if it really wanted to be a zebra. But Vulcan is only having a laugh - he sends the bear away and slaps its arse as it leaves. Then he makes a disturbing Lust Face and advances on Dale...