Tuesday 16 March 2021

Chapter Six - Tree Men of Mars


This time there are no cheats in the cliff-hanger escape. Zarkov recovers and moves Flash out of the way just in time. The bomber crashes into the rocks, but the Martians are unharmed. 

Flash fakes being still paralysed, luring the Martians to him so he can beat them up. At least he's clearly doing his own fight scenes now – no blatantly obvious stunt men this time.

Zarkov freezes a Martian during the fight and Flash, hilariously, uses the unconscious Martian to lure the remaining guards away from their Strato-sled, by, er...standing behind him and waving his arm.

Martians are credulous as hell, so their plan works. However, the Strato-sled is too damaged to take off. Their new plan is to use the Paralyser Gun to get gas masks in order to re-enter the tunnel to the Clay Kingdom, which, if you remember, is now filled with poison gas, thanks to Azura. They decide that the quickest way back to the Kingdom will be to use their Martian wings, so they climb up a cliff and jump off, as the Martians start shooting at them. It's not entirely clear whether they are still parachuting or actually flying, but they definitely move upwards as they take off. 

Anyway, Flash and Zarkov land back in Azura's kingdom and, disguised with Martian helmets, steal the gas masks from right under Ming's nose. Ming spots the Paralyser Gun and asks where the Earth men are, but Flash waves him away with the gun and he and Zarkov escape into the tunnel, taking a tube back to the Clay Kingdom.

Azura beams in and Ming tells her what's happened. It appears that this is the first time that Azura is aware of the tunnel, even though she filled it with poison gas in the first place. She turns two of her men into Clay People (they sort of volunteer, even though they're scared) and sends them into the tunnel after Flash and Zarkov, promising she'll return them to their normal bodies once their mission is accomplished.

Meanwhile, Flash arrives in the Clay Kingdom and paralyses some of the Clay People, threatening the Clay King with paralysis before his enemies. He then rescues Dale and Happy, leaving Zarkov with the Paralyser Gun trained on the Clay King.

Queen Azura's men arrive and knock out Zarkov, training the gun on the Clay King and revealing themselves as enemy agents. However, Flash throws a rock and disarms them, saving Zarkov and the Clay King. 

The Martians scatter and Flash explains everything to the Clay King, telling him all about their previous encounters with Ming. This necessitates a lengthy flashback to Space Soldiers, specifically the Invisibility Ray bit from Chapter Eleven – In The Jaws of the Tigron, where an invisible Flash does a strangle on Ming for a bit.

It's nice to see Princess Aura again, anyway.

The Clay King now understands everything, but says his people will be unable to help, as they are victims of Azura's wrath and “a mere shadow of a once mighty race”. Happy says, “But gee whizz, King, if you can't help us yourself, can't you steer us to somebody that will?” and the Clay King goes, “In your place, I should try the Forest People. They're a strange race, but honest and powerful.” This is the first time anyone's mentioned a third race of people on Mars, but whatever.

Back in Azura's palace, her men return, having failed her. She's not happy and she turns them back into Clay People, banishing them to the Clay caves. She seems to be able to teleport them, with the same cloud of smoke trick she uses on herself. Her men are frightened and plead for mercy, saying the Clay People will kill them, but she's unmoved.

Azura and Ming approach a televisor operative and ask to see the Earth men. The screen shows Flash, Dale, Zarkov and Happy moving through a wooded area that Azura immediately recognises as the Forest Kingdom. 

Ming says, “Isn't that the home of the Fire People?” Azura says yes, describing them as “the most savage nation on Mars”, adding that no-one has ever entered their Kingdom and lived. Ming notes that “Flash Gordon is no ordinary man” and asks Azura how she can make sure the Earth men will not escape. Azura says she has a plan and draws Ming's attention to an idol in the forest.

Watched by the Fire People in the trees (who basically look like wild-haired cavemen), Team Flash approach the idol. Happy takes a photograph of it and Azura somehow uses her powers to disintegrate it as he does so. This angers the Fire People and they start shooting fire bombs at Flash and his friends. They're soon trapped by a ring of fire. Dale faints, of course, but the others pass out too as the flames close in.


Another fail on behalf of the chapter title writers, by the way – they're clearly Fire Men, not Tree Men. Although, having said that, I can see how “Fire Men of Mars” wouldn't have worked, so fair enough.

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